Friday, February 17, 2012

If Only it Were Just a Headache

Being sick all of the time and having no control of it or over your life is not only frustrating and infuriating, but it is also depressing. I try, of course, to keep a positive outlook and count my blessings. Lately, though, I've been in a funk, I guess, is the way I know to describe it. I feel so depleted. It's like I don't have the energy to be positive. All my energy is spent being sick, worrying about being sick, and, mostly, worrying about my kids and how they are doing with all of this.  They seem happy, but my girls are worried about me, and I have a lot of guilt about that. They shouldn't have to worry about me.  My middle daughter probably asks me at least three times a day if I'm okay, the sweet thing. She has a basketball game coming up next week, her first one. I know she is worried that I will be sick and not be able to attend. I am, too. I know that I will be there, raging migraine or not. I'll fake it if I have to. I've done that a lot for my kids so they don't have to feel bad or worry; it's not their job to do that. I'm the Mama.
Anyway, I don't know if I've conveyed what I wanted to in this snippet of my life or not. But, I'm getting more down just thinking about this and reading it myself, so I really don't want to dwell on it anymore for now! Migraine is something that a lot of people don't understand. All of the pain, sacrifices, suffering and so forth that affect the migraineur and her family most people don't even realize, and I hope that this blog will help people to begin to understand some of these things.  

2 comments:

  1. I completely understand this! There is a flood of emotions that we feel when someone is under the impression the we are whining of "just a headache". But we push through those emotions of guilt, anger, sadness, etc.

    You are stronger than this because you are living through it everyday. :) You do what you have to do and get through.

    You give me amazing advice over on the forum and besides, you're my migraine twin. There is a light, us migraine ladies will find that tunnel somewhere!

    I hope you're doing better.

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    1. Thanks, Lisa, for your inspiring words. Like I mentioned in a previous reply to your comment on the "visit to neuro" post, I would really like to hear more about your story. Maybe you would consider being a guest blogger sometime??...

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