Tuesday, February 28, 2012

You Don't Really Expect Me to Read This

Last night, while sitting up alone, writing, battling insomnia, again, I started thinking about the parade of doctors that have come in and out of my life, GPs, neurologists, psychologists and so forth and the reasons why I left them. Usually, I did not choose to leave them. Most often I switched doctors due to referrals, moving or insurance issues. Anyway, my point is that I was thinking about my current neurologist, the one that I blogged about a few days ago. The one that would not acknowledge my opinions, resistance or fears and insisted I stay on Topamax and give Botox another shot (yes, pun intended--I like puns : D ) --yeah, he's the one. It dawned on me, during my musings, that I had forgotten to mention in my post that at my last visit he had flat-out refused to look at my migraine calendar (the one I posted on here). More specifically, he laughed and said, "You don't really expect me to read all of this, do you?" At the time, I was stunned, but I was not insulted. Why was I not insulted?  Because I realize that he is a busy man, and it is a kinda long calendar, blah, blah...
Last night, thinking back on it, I was a little disappointed and angry in myself for demanding that he not look at it. No, of course, I don't expect him to read every word, but he is my doctor, my caregiver, he should have, at least, perused it! It is kinda long--and why is it long??--Because I am sick, I have migraines every single day and I am anxious and depressed and I have auras and vertigo and dizziness and a plethora of other symptoms that he should care about if he cares about treating me properly, right?  I don't think that is too much to ask.

No comments:

Post a Comment